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Arguing with your spouse is a normal, healthy expression, but a recent study may prove that how you argue could have adverse affects on your heart. And we thought it was our undying love making our hearts beat a little faster.

According to the recent studies, how often a couple fights or what they fight about isn't as important to health as the reactions and resolutions that arise out of the fights. A study of almost 4,000 men and women from Framingham, Mass., asked whether they usually vented their feelings during arguments or kept emotions bottled up.

To my surprise, only 32 percent of men and 23 percent of women said they typically kept quiet in arguments with their spouse. I would have guessed a much higher percentage of men keep quiet, but maybe that's just a male stereotype? In any case, self-silencing, as it's called, can be harmful.

"When you're suppressing communication and feelings during conflict with your husband, it's doing something very negative to your physiology, and in the long term it will affect your health," said Elaine Eaker, an epidemiologist in Gaithersburg, Md., who was the lead author for the study. "This doesn't mean women should start throwing plates at their husbands, but there needs to be a safe environment where both spouses can equally communicate."

During one study, Utah researchers videotaped 150 couples to measure effects that marital arguing style has on heart risk. The researchers found that the style of argument discovered in the video sessions was a good predictor for a man or woman's risk for underlying heart disease.

Surprisingly, the way the couples interacted was as important a heart risk factor as whether they had high cholesterol or smoked, reported Timothy W. Smith, a psychology professor at the University of Utah who presented the study last year to the American Psychosomatic Society.

So, next time you feel like walking away from an arguing, trying sitting down like a grown-up and letting your partner know how you really feel. It could save your life one day.