AisleDash

Good advice on all counts, but the first one is soooo important. No sobbing maid of honor or stumbling best man ever made a wedding better - only more memorable for the wrong reasons. Some actually never make it to the end of the speech without help.

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I'm sick of brides and grooms acting like mud wrestling savages with the wedding cake. Ramming iced cake into someone's face, hair, and clothing is not funny or cute. It's disgusting, and I don't want to see it. And why would the couple want to spend the rest of the reception with frosting crusted hair, stained gown or tux, and smeared makeup on their special day? The symbolism of sharing that first bite of cake is something sweet and tender--it's supposed to signify that the couple will nurture each other in the marriage. Something that looks like a playground brawl misses the mark by a mile. Grow up!

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I am a retired Judge who performs between 20 and 30 wedding ceremonies each year... A couple of years ago I was at a fancy country club reception, about 250 guests when the best man got up to give the toast and started out by telling how many times the groom said he would never marry again... Then he launched into a 10 minute speech about all the first wife's faults and why the groom and she ended up divorced... The bride was in tears and the groom left the room... I have never seen anything like it before or since... The guests sat is stunned silence but he was so out of it he never missed a beat... When he finished and raised his glass to the happy couple nobody joined the toast...

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re: dragon mom or m-i-l; mine are both great and we got along before, during, and after the wedding. 11 years and counting. but if there are issues with them (i've had friends with parent problems during their wedding) you need to just let it go and have a good day. a wedding takes a lot of planning and preparing, don't let anyone ruin it for you and your soon to be spouse.

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Not following the rules of etiquette was left off, but the biggest one that bugs me is when people bring wedding gifts to the wedding! The gifts are supposed to be sent well before the wedding. The bride and groom won't have time to take care of these gifts before leaving for their honeymoon so someone else will have to assume the responsiblity. I just think people have forgotten the rules of etiquette. Also, why do people think children belong at a wedding? Most of them can't sit still, they are noisy, and they misbehave-- all of which will be picked up in the wedding video.
I do agree about the time between the wedding and the reception. Several brides I have known have decided to ignore the part about where the groom doesn't see his bride until she walks down the aisle, but some brides have had the pictures taken BEFORE the actual wedding. Also, if they choose to wait until AFTER the wedding and before the reception, the guests should be fed while waiting.

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One of the worst is including a note in the wedding invitation of where the couple is registered for gifts... just plain tacky!

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Another good tip- Don't try to be funny when making a toast! This includes throwing in an inside joke into the toast, it just makes you look dumb, or makes people think you are drunk!

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I had a simple "Southern Baptist" wedding with a cake and punch reception, but while we were taking pictures, snack food was out in the reception hall for everyone to eat, finger sandwiches, cheese trays, fruit, all sorts of things. Did anyone go eat it before we got there? That would be a no. No one wanted to start until we got there. Finally someone stepped up to be the first in line. i thought I was doing the right thing by taking care of my guests, but they were too polite to do it:)

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Wedding announcers are the most annoying aspect of a reception. As the wedding party files into the banquet room, they are each announced over a microphone. It is so tacky!

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Wedding announcers are the most annoying aspect of a reception. As the wedding party files into the banquet room, they are each announced over a microphone. It is so tacky!

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Wedding announcers are the most annoying aspect of a reception. As the wedding party files into the banquet room, they are each announced over a microphone. It is so tacky!

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We put a lot of time and effort into our wedding plans but there was so much bad behavior that if we had it to do over again, we would elope!! One guest got high on something(?) and walked around talking to strangers --barefoot--; female guests made a mess of the air in the only women's restroom by smoking there (we were married on a "restaurant" boat) when there was a strict --no smoking-- policy boat-wide; one guest drank 7 mixed drinks and TOLD us he did so because --we were paying--; one guest tried to start a fight with the DJ because he changed the music before the song was finished; one couple showed-up with their son in his grass-stained Little League uniform, when children were not invited at all; one guest danced like a tramp and another was high on cocaine; one set of parents left the "parent's table" to sit with relatives elsewhere and --never came back!-- All of this by people who claim to care for us! My husband and I are educated and have careers, etc.; the behavior we witnessed at our wedding was nighmarish.. if we could do it over again, we would elope and spend all of that money on an amazing honeymoon!

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At a wedding a very nervous best man sat down next to my wife and confessed he hadn't a clue on what to say for the toast. My wife suggested that he simply say that today is the very first day of your new life together and as glorious as today is, each day wil be even better than the last. When the toasting time arrived a very confident and smilling best man stood, beamed at the audience, affectionally looked at the bride and groom and confidently stated to one and all: Dear Carol and Joe "I hope this will be worst day in your lives".

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It's unfortunate the bride and groom act like to spoiled children and keep telling everyone this is "their week", and "their wedding". It is not the time or the place to decide that you must put the feelings of a crooked parent ahead of the parent that has done everything for you and taken care of you financially or emotionally. When the other parent has stolen from you and taken your identity for their own needs its reprehensible that they are the one the child decides they must develop a relationship with that week. But then again that person is always there for the show. When the person who has taken care of you says that is a problem and not acceptable you should listen and not expect push them to their breaking point because it is "their week and day". The new in-laws should stay out of it when they don't know all of the history and encourage the child to stay with the parent who has been true to them their whole life.

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This one is for all brides...... Don't be a bride from hell! Discuss all money issues w/ your bridal party way before hand! Don't assume just because you pick out a certain dress,shoes,jewlery,and so on for your bridal party doesn't mean they could afford it! Make sure you set a reasonable budget and clue them in immediatley! I just think spending a boat load of money on a dress bridesmaids will probably never wear again is nuts! Keep in mind they have bills to pay and they work hard for that money, so don't be so quick to spend it! Having a beautiful wedding is wonderful, but I just think that some brides loose sight of what that day is REALLY about! I had a gorgeous wedding, but I also knew that it costed them money to be a part of my big day..so I made sure that everything I had picked out was within reason for everyone! It makes for a much happier bridal party!

and one other tip..remember "After the wedding ends, the marriage begins"! :)

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This one is for all brides...... Don't be a bride from hell! Discuss
all money issues w/ your bridal party way before hand! Don't assume
just because you pick out a certain dress,shoes,jewlery,and so on for
your bridal party doesn't mean they could afford it! Make sure you set
a reasonable budget and clue them in immediatley! I just think
spending a boat load of money on a dress bridesmaids will probably
never wear again is nuts! Keep in mind they have bills to pay and
they work hard for that money, so don't be so quick to spend it!
Having a beautiful wedding is wonderful, but I just think that some
brides loose sight of what that day is REALLY about! I had a
gorgeous wedding, but I also knew that it costed them money to be a
part of my big day..so I made sure that everything I had picked out
was within reason for everyone! It makes for a much happier bridal
party! and one other tip..remember "After the wedding ends, the
marriage begins"! :)

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Whoever said that children don't belong at a wedding, get a life. It maybe the second wedding. The bride and groom may have children of their own. Their sisters' and brothers' have children, if you have room at your wedding to invite children.. I have seen that they had the best time. It is sometimes the uptight bride that is trying to control everyone and everything ( you can't ..Sleeping Beauty ... Snow White..etc were real princesses .. you are paying to be one )

As far bringing gifts to a wedding, feel lucky that you got any!!!!!!! I have seen drunken adults go around and pick up the cards meant for the bride and groom. No one will leave with a box dolly.

50 percent will be married more than once. So the first wedding is a drama. If you spend more on your wedding than you did on the down payment on your house. There is a problem. It is only a day. And the mistakes.. make the memories.

anything too perfect... is never remembered...or any fun...

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Whoever said that children don't belong at a wedding, get a life. It
maybe the second wedding. The bride and groom may have children of their own. Their sisters' and brothers' have children, if you have room at your wedding to invite children.. do it... I have seen that they ( the children ) had the best time.
Wait til you get your own little ones.. then you will want to drag them everywhere.
Trying to control everyone and everything?? Well you can't ..Sleeping Beauty ...Snow White..etc were real princesses .. you are paying to be one for the day, and you make such poor brides. After a couple of these "outings" one learns to send regrets with a card and skip the great white horror. (Look closely at your regrets, they may know that you are a bridizlla already)

As far bringing gifts to a wedding, feel lucky that you got any!!!!!!! I have seen drunken adults go around and pick up the cards meant for the bride and groom. No one will leave with a boxed gift dolly, put they will lift cash.

50 percent will be married more than once. So the first wedding is a drama. If you spend more on your wedding, than will on the down payment on your first home, I see a problem with stress and control for the day. It is only a day. And the mistakes..
make the memories. Anything too perfect... is never really remembered...or if i can remember, it wasn't any fun either.

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My wedding day was one of the happiest days of 43 years of life. My husband & I waited 12 years to tie the knot. We had over 400 friends & family who attended. From children to grandparents, it was joyous. Of course, you run into minor problems, (ie.food not quite ready& forgetting the wedding handouts for your guest), but everything works out. It's unbelievable how your loved ones go to the extent of making your day perfect. I believe that unless you have a loving, close relationship family, this would not be possible. I have over 400 relatives just on my side which were not all there and my husband has a total of 8 siblings incl. himself from the same parents. I am so greatful that both our families, different heritages, carry a close family bond. Everyone is included in our events, that's what makes it so special. You are able to look back years later and most likely, see how well you & the family raised a great member. This is what bonds the family together so closely. Eventually these so called kids, will be grown up and at your level if not above. Also, picking and choosing your friends also makes a difference in what happens around you. Oh, I do agree with serving ordourve's during pics.

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Young children under age 7 can ruin a wedding. Their screaming and running is so distracting. At a wedding I once attended, the parents brought babysitters to stay with the kids in their hotel rooms during the ceremony and reception. And everything was much more dignified. Another suggestion: Brides should simply ask their bridesmaids to wear their favorite dress to the wedding, instead of demanding that they spend lots of money on ugly matching dresses that they will never again wear.

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