Sometimes a couple is ready to get married, but not ready to have a wedding. Maybe they're still in school, or one of them is shipping out with the military soon, or they can only be covered by their partner's insurance policies if they tie the knot -- so they want to get married now, but for whatever reason do not have time to plan a wedding. These people could have a small ceremony or quick civil service, but that's not what they want. They want to be married now, but also don't want to miss out on the big wedding they've always dreamed of -- which can't happen until later.

I know of a few couples who have been in this situation, and all of them said the same thing: we'll just have a quiet legal ceremony now, and we'll do the "real" wedding later when we have time. But of everyone I know who has said this, none of them ever actually had their two weddings. They either got married and then lost enthusiasm for the big wedding, or their two weddings idea met with such resistance from family that they just decided to have only the big ceremony, though perhaps a bit rushed and not exactly as they'd hoped it would be.

I am of the opinion that a couple can throw their wedding however they want, and guests who don't like it should keep quiet -- they have the right not to attend, and don't need to start a big feud over something like this. However, I do find it a little odd that a couple who is already married would want to go through the vows and "I now pronounce you" bit just for show. If you want to have a big celebration after your wedding, why not elope now and hold just a reception later? You can still wear a big white dress if you want. Or have a vow renewal ceremony instead of calling it a wedding. That seems more appropriate -- but who am I to make the rules? Let's see what others have to say about it.