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The language of love may in fact be international, but there can still be miscommunication, because people tend to express their love in different ways. Have you ever gone to all lengths to cook a romantic meal for your partner, complete with pretty plates and candles, only to have him gobble it down and go turn on the TV just like any other night? When your romantic gestures seem to go unnoticed, you're not speaking in your partner's love dialect. That's where Gary Chapman's book The Five Love Languages comes in handy to help us understand how to communicate love to our partner. Chapman breaks it down into five main love languages.
1. Quality time – To those who speak this language, making the commitment to spend time together speaks volumes.
2. Receiving gifts – These people aren't petty or materialistic, they just feel the most loved when they get unexpected little notes or trinkets that say "I love you."
3. Acts of service – This language basically boils down to helping out around the house, but it's important to know which tasks are most meaningful to the other person (i.e. don't clean up the garage when the toilets need scrubbed inside).
4. Word of affirmation – People who speak this language love small, spoken expressions of affection, "I just love the way you make an ordinary dinner special," or "You look so nice in that dress."
5. Physical touch – Just as it sounds, this language is all about expressing love through touch.
If you and your partner often miss the mark and put your efforts into the wrong things, it's worth investigating love languages to learn what really makes you each feel loved.